


I'm Coming (Around)

by dizzy



Series: Trip and Stumble [5]
Category: Glee RPF, StarKid Productions RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-05
Updated: 2012-12-05
Packaged: 2017-11-20 08:30:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/583318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizzy/pseuds/dizzy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Well, this is pretty much all about the sex.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Coming (Around)

Sometimes the intimate things Chris knows about Darren can catch him off guard. 

He’s watching Darren play a set at a bar off campus in late January. Darren gets really into the song. It’s Darren’s own arrangement on a pop hit, and he’s crooning his all into it, eyes shut and mouth open and so deliciously intense. 

Darren stands up after it’s done to flex and get some water and Chris is struck by that movement, because he’s seen it before; Darren rising off of the bed, reaching around to get a bottle of water for them to share. 

The thought, the memory, leaves him shifting to accommodate a hard on in pants really not designed for hiding anything. Darren disappears toward the bar and then comes back a few minutes later, sliding a new drink over to Chris. There aren’t any chairs left at their table, so he plops himself into Chris’s lap. 

“Ew,” Chris says, pretending to mind. “You’re sweating all over me.” 

“You like it.” Darren winks at him. He shifts in Chris’s lap and then lifts an eyebrow, leaning in. “You really like it.” 

“Not that,” Chris says. He keeps his voice low. He already has an arm around Darren just to make sure he stays put in Chris’s lap. He lets his hand rest on Darren’s thigh, rubbing a little. “You just looked good up there.” 

“You look good.” Darren sits a little straighter, moving his ass in a way that definitely serves no purpose besides grinding Chris’s dick against him. “Feel good, too.” 

Chris digs his fingers into Darren’s thigh and mutters, “Not fair,” as Darren gets pulled into a conversation with someone else. 

After a minute, Chris nudges him up. He can’t handle this, he needs to move. Preferably somewhere that his boner won’t be instantly noticeable as soon as he stands up. “Let’s dance.” 

Darren is off his lap in an instant. “My beau wants to dance, and who am I to deny him?” 

Chris gives everyone a not-entirely-apologetic smile as Darren leads him across the floor. The next band on stage is louder, clangier than Chris likes, but it’s not bad to dance to - especially not with Darren crowding in close and hot. He slides both hands into Darren’s back pockets and hauls him in. 

“Oh, baby, you are hot for it tonight, aren’t you?” It’s such a cheesy line but Darren’s voice is pure sex and Chris always thought weak knees were a cliche but it turns out, no, not really. There’s not really any point in denying it, so he nods and whines and thrusts forward. Darren sneaks a hand between them to grope. “Fuck, so hard for me.” 

Chris battles the almost dead even urges to pull back in case someone is watching them, and to push himself against Darren’s hand. “Stop that!” 

“You know, you don’t really sound like you want me to stop...” Darren’s thumb rubs firmly along the line of Chris’s cock through his too-tight pants. “Sounds more like you really want me to keep going.” 

“Not here,” Chris pleads. Darren might be able to sweet talk him into a lot of things, but he’s still got a while to go before he’s ready for public sex. 

“Oh, fine.” Darren moves his hand away. “Can I still talk, though?” 

“Of course.” Chris gives him a strange look. “Why would I stop you from talking.” 

“You’re cute,” Darren grins. “No, I mean, can I still _talk_... about what I want to do to you...” 

“Uhm.” Chris tries to hide his face. “Here?” 

“Yeah, here.” Darren’s fingers stroke over the small of his back. “Sharing is caring, Chris. I want you to know just how much I care. Like, for example, I really care about that sound you make when I swallow while you’re fucking my mouth.” 

“Ohgod,” Chris groans. He’s pretty sure he doesn’t even do that - fuck Darren’s mouth - but it’s still hot as hell to hear Darren say it. 

“And the way you grab my hair when you’re close...” Darren continues. Chris has to concede that yes, he definitely does that. “And God, I love it when you come in my mouth so much. Will you do that, Chris? Will you fuck my mouth and let me swallow it all down?” 

Chris is panting now, squirming into Darren like he just can’t get close enough, because he really can’t. He doesn’t even sound like himself when he says, “Can we leave?” 

“Yes-” Darren starts to pull him in the direction of the door right away. He stops, though, and Chris runs into his back. He’s so hard it _hurts_ , why is Darren stopping? “No. Shit. Your dorm free?” 

“No,” Chris says, because Justin had been there earlier when he’d left. “Why not yours?” 

“I told Joey I’d clear out until midnight, he had a date he wanted to bring back.” Darren’s frustration is obvious. “I mean, we kick him out like twice a week, I couldn’t really say no.” 

He’s right, of course, but that doesn’t make it any less frustrating to hear. 

“Darren...” Chris plasters himself against Darren’s back and rests his forehead on Darren’s shoulder. “In that case I need a very cold shower.” 

Darren turns around and kisses Chris, pushing their bodies together. “Trust me?” 

“Yeah,” Chris says, breathless. Darren grabs his hand and leads him in a different direction. 

Towards the bathroom. 

“Darren!” Chris laughs. “Are you serious-” 

“Do you want to come?” Darren asks, eyes flashing with something less mirthful and, fuck, there’s that weak-kneed feeling again. 

Chris nods. 

The bathroom is small and cramped and dirty and there are other people in it, but Darren ignores them and Chris tries to. They shove into the stall on the far end and almost before the lock is slotted into place Darren is turning on Chris and pushing him against the wall. 

Chris has no choice but to go with it, and it’s not like he’s that reluctant with Darren’s mouth on his and Darren’s hands already undoing his pants to shove them down to his thighs. “I really want to be swallowing you down. I want to be on your bed laying down on my back with you on top of me, straddling my face, fucking my mouth. Shit, Chris, you want it? You want that, too? You want to come in my mouth?” 

Chris’s head is flung back and his fingers are digging into Darren’s shoulders as Darren’s hand flies on him, dry friction that’s borderline uncomfortable but no power in the universe could make him ask Darren to stop. “Yes,” he gasps. “I wanna... _that_... wanna do that...” 

It’s the reality of Darren here, looking at him, talking to him, that does it more than the mental image his words are painting. He starts to make high, whining noises without even realize he’s doing. Darren claps a hand over Chris’s mouth to quiet him. “You want everyone to hear?” He asks, grinning. “That’s kind of hot, too, isn’t it? Everyone out there knowing how fucking good we do it?” 

Chris jerks in his grasp, eyes wide. Darren is grinding against his hip and the heat between them has Chris’s shirt damp at the small of his back and his neckline. “Fuck!” 

“Yeah, just like that.” Darren licks at his neck. “You gonna come for me, Chris? Fuck, you’re gorgeous like this. Look at that, look at your cock, fuck.” 

Chris can’t help the long, low noise that spills from him as he comes messily over Darren’s fist. It drips past his knuckles onto the floor and wow, okay, every fear he’d ever had about how disgusting this bathroom is can now be confirmed firsthand, but he doesn’t have it in him to care just yet. 

“Chris, please,” Darren whines and thrusts harder into his hip. “Come on, touch me. Get my dick out, come on.” 

“Bossy,” Chris teases, leaning forward to an off-center kiss while he tugs Darren out of his looser cargo pants. Darren is hot and hard in his grasp, leaking precome that smears over Chris’s fingertips. Darren starts to fuck his fist right away and Chris knows by now just how Darren likes it; tight grasp, something to work into. Darren likes to _move_ , and Chris secretly gets off on watching him and imagining what it would be like if it were more than his fist Darren was thrusting into. What was a distantly uncomfortable idea before gets more and more alluring the more they do together. 

Darren manages an impressive level of quiet as he comes, and Chris is clear-headed enough to grab tissue this time to catch most of it. What spills against his thumb he brings to his mouth to suck off, making Darren shudder as he watches with heavy-lidded eyes. 

They slump together afterward, arms around each other. Chris puts his head on Darren’s shoulder and realizes he can still hear the music through the bathroom walls, and the people come in and out, the sound of piss hitting a urinal... 

It’s not exactly the post-sex cuddle time he wants. He feels lazy and sleepy now and he wants to be in bed with Darren wrapped up in covers exchanging lazy kisses.

“How long do you have to give Joey?” Chris asks, lips brushing Darren’s jaw. 

Darren pulls his phone out of his pocket and looks. “Fuck. Another hour.” 

“An hour,” Chris says, dully. He doesn’t want to stay here another hour. 

Darren pulls back, reaching up to muss Chris’s hair a little bit more instead of helping him fix it. He’s smiling but there’s a little bit of frustration in his face that mirrors what Chris is feeling. “Come on. I’ll buy you a drink.” 

He holds Chris’s hand and keeps him a little closer than he normally would as they rejoin their friends. There’s a little more room at the table but Darren still sits in Chris’s lap, tugging Chris’s arms around him. They’re both quieter, curling in close and only occasionally contributing to the conversation. Chris slides a hand under Darren’s shirt just to feel the warmth of his skin, fingers rubbing back and forth over Darren’s side. 

It would be great, except for the looks Brian keeps giving them. 

“What?” Darren finally asks. 

Brian scowls at the table. “Nothing.” 

Beside him, Meredith is snickering. “Oh, Brian just really has to pee.” 

“Uh, bathrooms are that way...” Darren points. 

“No,” Brian says firmly. “No, those bathrooms are a tainted place now.” 

“Okay, see, Brian had to go like... fifteen minutes ago? And apparently he walked in on...” Meredith waves her finger back and forth between Chris and Darren.

“A couple of horny, noisy assholes,” Brian finishes. 

“Noisy assholes in a bathroom. Go figure,” Darren says, unapologetically grinning. . 

Chris hides his face against Darren’s shoulder, mortified. Darren just laughs, though under the table he covers Chris’s hand with his own reassuringly. 

Brian throws a wadded up napkin at Darren. 

“Please, you should be thanking us,” Darren scoffs. “Normally we’d charge for a show like that.” 

“Darren!” Chris laughs, playfully scolding. 

“We’re hot, Chris. Deal with it.” Darren gives him a wet, smacking kiss on the cheek. 

*

Darren touches Chris a lot. 

When they’re in the same room, they’re almost always touching. It doesn’t matter if it’s the lobby in Chris’s building, in Darren’s apartment, in a classroom or the dining hall, Darren gravitates toward him. 

He doesn’t think he remembers Darren being this touchy-feely with anyone before they started dating. Affectionate, yes, but not like this, and he can’t decide if it’s because Darren has some sort of sixth sense that tells him how touch-starved Chris really was or if Darren just genuinely wants that connection any time he can get it. 

Chris sort of loves it, though. He looks for it now, expects it. It leaves him smiling and breathless still sometimes, just the casual drape of an arm over his shoulders or Darren leaning into him or just the press of thigh to thigh when Darren scoots a chair closer. 

They’re sharing the recliner in Darren’s living room while they watch a movie with some of their friends. It’s an actual movie night, the mellow kind that Chris sort of prefers to the boisterous party nights. The chair is a tight squeeze for them but they tend to sacrifice seating arrangements for instrument space, and Chris very rarely minds Darren being half on top of him, no matter what the circumstances. Now is no exception, not with the way Darren is lazily playing with his fingers and placing little kisses on Chris’s neck and shoulder every few minutes. 

Chris runs his fingers through curls that are getting a little longer and shaggier than they have been since he actually met Darren. He secretly thinks it looks sort of funny sometimes, but it’s so nice to touch, and there’s something startlingly hot about grabbing and tugging on Darren’s hair when Darren is blowing him. 

He’s pretty sure there won’t be any blowjobs tonight. He really needs to head back to his own bed once the movie is over, but it’s hard to resist a lap full of warm sleepy Darren on a cold night like this. He shifts and leans his head against Darren’s a little more closely, smiling and accepting a soft, short kiss when Darren turns his head a little. 

“Love you,” Darren whispers, only just loud enough for Chris to hear. 

Chris smiles widely, eyes shutting. They don’t say those words very often - only a couple of times since the first little admission. He squeezes his arms tighter around Darren and whispers back, “I love you, too.” 

Darren looks insufferably pleased with himself, and turns back to the movie with his fingers still stroking over Chris’s knuckles leisurely. 

*

Chris walks into the apartment the next Tuesday evening and the first thing he sees is Darren stretched out on the floor with a grimace on his face. 

Chris looks at Joey. “What did you do to him?”

“Wasn’t me!” Joey says. “He did it all to himself. He fought the couch, and the couch won.” 

“It cheated,” Darren grumbles, without opening his eyes. 

“Yes, how dare physics not bend to your whims.” Joey mocks from his position stretched out on the traitorous couch. 

“Chris.” Darren finally opens his eyes, whining. “My back hurts.” 

“Poor baby. Why aren’t you in bed?” 

“No strength. Too far away. I’m fading... come say your final goodbyes...” Darren feebly lifts up a hand and then lets it flop back to the ground.

Chris laughs and walks over to Darren, reaching both hands down. “Come on. Bed.” 

Darren looks at him and takes a breath, steeling himself for the wave of pain to come. As he lets Chris pull him to his feet, Chris can see that while Darren might be milking it a little bit, it really does hurt. He lets Darren lean on him as they walk into the bedroom, leaving Joey with the living room to himself. 

“You need something? Medicine?” Chris asks, sitting on the edge of the bed once Darren has laid down. 

Darren shakes his head. “Took something, just waiting on it to kick in. Just sit in here with me?” 

“Of course.” Chris stretches out beside him, propping himself on one elbow so he can look at Darren. “The couch, hmm?” 

Darren laughs. “No, it wasn’t the couch. I had a dance class today and I fucked up my back or something, it’s all sore. The couch just made it worse.” 

“Want a back rub?” Chris asks, a touch nervously. “I mean, I’ve never given one, but-” 

Darren rolls over immediately, wiggling out of his shirt impossibly fast. “Please?”

Chris takes a moment to just let his eyes sweep over the warm, golden skin on display. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of just looking at Darren. 

“Where should I...” He trains off, stroking his hands up and down with gentle pressure. 

“Actually, I’ve got some oil stuff in my bottom drawer, if you want to grab it?” Darren says. Chris knows easily by now which dresser belongs to Darren, so he doesn’t hesitate to yank open the drawer just as Darren quickly says. “No, wait, wait, third drawer-” 

Chris gapes down at what he sees in the bottom drawer. “Uh.” 

From his spot on the bed, Darren winces. “Uh. You weren’t actually suppose to see that.” 

“What... um. What is this?” Chris stares down at it. Of course, he knows what it is - he just wants to see what sort of explanation Darren has. 

“A dildo.” Darren sits up, sucking in a breath at a twinge of pain. “Uh. My dildo.” 

“And your porn collection?” Chris definitely doesn’t feel brave enough to pick up the purple (and really, purple? But it’s Darren, of course it’s purple) dildo but he does grab one of the dvd boxes. Two guys overly tanned, well built guys are going at it on the front. “Who actually buys porn anymore? Don’t you know how to use the internet?” 

“Hey, I appreciate knowing that the talent gets their cut of the purchase,” Darren says, defending his porn. “Also, it’s fun getting things in the mail. A little pop up that says download complete isn’t nearly as rewarding.” 

Chris shuts the drawer with one last lingering look at the dildo. He opens the bottom one and finds massage oil next to the lube. “What did you have this for?” 

Almost as soon as he asks, he regrets it. He has a feeling it might be in there for the same reason there’s a half empty box of condoms, remnants of whatever Darren got up to before they got together. Chris knows they definitely haven’t done anything requiring condoms yet. 

“Actually, I got the massage stuff from the same site I got the dvds,” Darren says. Chris’s questions don’t seem to bother him. “I opened it to make sure it didn’t smell funky or anything. I thought we could use it. You know, whenever.” 

“Lay back down if you want me to rub your back. And the... other thing?” Chris runs a little hot - in the embarrassed way, not the turned on way - at the thought of saying the word out loud. “Is that new, too?” 

“Actually...” Darren draws out the word this time, as he turns back over. Chris straddles him and uncaps the oil, spreading it over his palms and then letting it drizzle onto Darren’s back. He has no idea how much he needs. “I got that like... a month after I met you.” 

“What?” Chris isn’t sure if Darren is just laying out the timeline, or trying to imply some sort of connection there. 

“Why do I feel like a creep saying this?” Darren mumbles to himself. Then, louder: “I got it because I kept thinking about you, and what it might feel like if you fucked me.” 

“Oh.” Chris swallows hard. “And is that... something you like?” 

Darren moans low when Chris’s hands pass over the sorest spot. “Fuck, that feels good. And... I mean. Yeah. Eventually. But I’m not in any hurry. I don’t want - uh, right there, please - shit, yeah. I don’t, I don’t want you to think I’m like... in a hurry or anything.” 

Chris has sort of realized that Darren might be holding back sexually because of him, but this is his first real confirmation of it. 

He’s not nearly as embarrassed as he thought he’d be. More than anything, he’s intrigued by what Darren has been doing. “Do you like it? … using it?” 

“Wh- oh, the... oh. Um. Yeah, actually. I mean, I think it would be better with another person, but it’s... it’s definitely good.” Darren starts to shift his hips a little. Chris digs in harder with his thumbs, only pausing to get more massage oil. With every firm stroke up and down he lets his hands wander lower, closer to Darren’s ass. “What about you? Have you ever...?”

“No,” Chris admits. “Never. I mean, my own fingers, but- what?”

He stops because Darren groans. “No, keep going, it’s not that - just, you saying that. The _visuals_ , Chris. The visuals.” 

Chris grins. “Yeah? I could never really, um, reach well enough with my own hands. Or maybe I just... i don’t know. It seemed uncomfortable. And it’s not like jerking off ever really got old. It was just... easier.” 

Somehow the very concept of what he’d been doing himself had always been enough to kill any truly sexual mood he’d been in when he’d started, during all those attempts at self-exploration in high school. 

“Well, I can give first hand testimony, taking it up the ass can feel pretty damn good.” Darren shifts again, and this time Chris is certain he’s rubbing himself against the mattress. “And the minute you decide you want to try it out, you let me know. Seriously, I don’t care if the world is ending, I don’t care if I’m in the middle of an exam, I don’t care if George Lucas has just casually dropped by to discuss future franchise plans and he needs a new Han Solo, you fucking pick up that phone and call me.” 

“What if it’s during a new episode of Avatar?” Chris asks. 

“Well, you can wait until the end of the episode, but as soon as it’s over, call me,” Darren orders. 

“So when you say try it out...” Chris tries to think of the politest way to phrase it, and then remembers who he is talking to and what he is talking about and suddenly stops caring as much. “Who do you imagine being on top?” 

“Shit,” Darren murmurs. Chris is still moving his hands over Darren’s skin but he’s not really massaging anymore so much as he’s just petting and caressing the warm flesh in a hypnotizing way. “I don’t know. I figured we could try it both ways and just see what we like.” 

Darren starts to wiggle around and they laughingly navigate their way into a new position, Darren on his back now. “You’re going to get your sheets all messy,” Chris warns, knowing the massage oil is still slick and fresh in places. 

“Yeah, well, I was hoping we could kind of do that anyway.” He reaches up and tugs on the lapels of the button down Chris is wearing. “C’mere, I gotta kiss you now, after that little discussion.” 

Chris is still laughing when their mouths meet. “Sure your back can handle that?” 

“Who said I’m doing the work?” Darren answers flippantly, grabbing Chris’s ass with both hands to yank him down. “Looks like you’re on top to me.” 

The door flies open. Joey takes one look at them and says, “Shit, forgot to knock.” He steps back out of the room and slams the door - then knocks. 

“Don’t come in!” Darren shouts. “We’re naked.”

“Uh.” Joey appears to be stumped. Finally he says, “No, you’re not. I just saw you.” 

“Well, we can be, if you give us like five minutes,” Darren calls back out. 

Joey opens the door again. “Please, for the love of God, no.” 

Darren jumps straight into bargaining. “You can have the last frozen burrito.” 

“You already ate it,” Joey says. “Plus, I’m pretty sure I bought that one anyway.”

“Okay, you can have the next frozen burrito. And I’ll buy it. You can get one of the kind that actually has meat in it.” 

“I appreciate your generosity, of bestest of rooming mates, but I’m actually just passing along a message. You left your phone in there and Brian keeps texting you asking you where you are.” 

“Shit!” Darren groans. “I forgot to cancel on him.” 

“Want me to?” Joey holds up Darren’s phone and waves it around.

“No. Give me my phone. Last time I trusted you with it, you sent my cousin a picture of your balls.” 

“Well, you should be more careful with your contact list next time. How was I supposed to know which Lauren it was?” 

“Not by just randomly guessing,” Darren says. He sits up to grab the phone and his face immediately screws up in pain. “Oh. Ow. Okay, painkillers have not entirely kicked in yet, noted.” 

Chris grabs the phone and then gently guides Darren back down. Joey is happy to hand it back over and make an exit. He gets sort of twitchy now when he walks in on one or both of them shirtless. “I’ll text Brian for you. You lay down.” 

Darren pouts up at him. “Stay with me?” 

“Maybe if you ask nicely... no funny business this time.” Chris is already typed a reply to Brian into the phone, but he glances up at Darren to smile flirtily. “Unless you want to tell me some more about that dildo.” 

“Why, Christopher!” Darren smirks, playing at being scandalized. “I will tell you anything you want to know...” 

*

There are two hours every Wednesday that Chris finds himself with absolutely nothing to do. 

If he were a responsible student, he’d use the time for study. 

Instead he uses it to jerk off. 

He actually has a sex life now (and, okay, still so far from being something he’s used to) but there’s still that undercurrent of nerves and frustration and am I good enough and did I do that right and sometimes sex is actually a little bit stressful. Jerking off is still just... it’s nice, it’s tension relieving, it feels good in a different way than getting off with someone else does. 

He doesn’t have the privacy of his own bedroom anymore. The previous semester he’d had later classes than Justin three times a week, almost always ensuring he had some alone time. This semester their schedules line up frustratingly, which means this two hours a week is basically his only chance unless he wants to resort to the humiliation of jerking off in a dorm bathroom stall. 

(He definitely does not.) 

So he stretches out on his bed with lube and a t-shirt he’s willing to sacrifice in the name of clean up both half-hidden under his blankets in case Justin does come back early, and shuts his eyes, letting his mind wander. 

It wanders straight to Darren, of course. It’s not like he’s stopped finding other guys attractive but there’s only one guy whose body he is now intimately acquainted with. 

Darren gets this intense look on his face when he’s close to coming that Chris really could stare at forever. His skin glistens and drips with sweat, catching on the roughness of that always-there stubble, droplets sliding down his neck and pooling on his skin, smearing onto Chris. The sheets get damp with it but Chris doesn’t care, can’t care about anything except the way Darren’s pupils are blown and his mouth is bitten red and his lips are so soft, so kissable, Chris goes in again and again for just one more taste, drawn between watching and feeling. 

It’s best when he’s got his hand on Darren, like a circuit being closed, feeling the pulse and jerk of his cock and seeing the same pleasure twitching outward to his curling fingers and his gasping mouth. He likes it when Darren is leaking against his palm, likes swiping his fingers around and around the tip to tease and then stroking hard, giving him just the right friction and tightness until Darren’s expression gets screwed up with tension and pleasure and he comes. He comes hard - not reserved like Chris, who still hasn’t quite gotten the hang of letting go, who stifles every noise and stays as still as he can while it crashes through him. Darren comes with his whole body, flexing and grunting and drawing it out, giving his whole self over to it. 

There’s so much promise there, so much Chris thinks they could do, if they had time to do it. If they weren’t always in a hurry, worried about someone walking in. Handjobs and blowjobs are great and sometimes they can even take their time, promised an hour here and there, but even then there are roommates that hear every exaggerated thump and creak and groan and will not hesitate to mock later. 

In Chris’s imagination, they’re granted a lot more freedom. All of the secret dirty thoughts Chris has when they’re naked and pressed close gather more clarity and his hand moves faster on himself and everything tumbles together perfectly until he’s gasping and coming over his fist, Darren’s name not on his lips but certainly on his mind. 

He lays there with his breath thready and his pulse still pounding. His phone is just off to the side of his pillow and blinks with a new text from Darren. He picks it up with his clean hand and, in a moment of pure impulse, pulls up his camera app and takes a picture of the come splattered across his stomach. 

He sends it before he can rethink the decision, adding in a cheeky _was just thinking about you_ underneath the image. 

Darren responses are lightning fast: _wow oh fuck ok wow_ and then _Guess who is definitely not standing up until everyone else has left the classroom. This guy._ and then a third _Wait what were you thinking?_

He’s already come, but somehow knowing he’s turning Darren on is almost as good. He types back, _What I would do to you if I had you here._

It takes longer for Darren to respond this time. Chris takes a minute to wipe up and then just luxuriates in laying in bed with no hurry at all. 

Darren finally responds: _bathroom now, tell me. quick pls._

Chris very much on purpose doesn’t let himself overthink. He texts back the first dirty thought that comes to his mind. _I want to come on your face._

_more???_

Darren wants more. Of course he does. Chris lets his mind go blank and then pulls back one of the fantasies from before. _I want to fuck you with your toy. I want to make you beg._

There’s no reply, and then Darren’s face fills his screen with an incoming call. “Oh my God you broke me,” Darren says. His voice is all rough and low and sexy. “I haven’t jerked off in a bathroom stall in like three years. Chris, you broke me.” 

Chris giggles, so pleased with himself. “You should get back to class.” 

“Shit. I should. Just... fuck, Chris.” Darren whines. “I want all that, too, okay? All of it.” 

Chris strokes lazily over himself, starting to get hard. He doesn’t say anything to Darren, though, because Darren does need to get to class and Chris doesn’t want to be the reason he gets in trouble. 

But that doesn’t mean Chris doesn’t have time. He just waits until Darren hangs up the phone to leisurely head into round two. 

*

It’s movie night.

Chris is enjoying himself, relaxed and looking forward to a weekend with very little to do. He doesn’t have a shift in the library until Sunday evening, so he can overindulge in alcohol and fun with the promise of no alarm clock on Saturday morning. 

After the neighbors have paid them a friendly visit with a noise level reminder, most of the people clear out except for their closest friends. A dozen or so of them are left, most of whom Chris knows from experience won’t end up making it home before daylight. 

“I wanna dance!” Chris announces, grabbing Darren and trying to bodily drag him away from the conversation he’s in. “Dance with me.” 

“No!” Joey announces loudly. “No dancing, because we are going to play a game now, and _everyone. must. play._ ” 

Chris is intrigued enough by the idea of a game to forget about dancing. Darren seems intrigued solely by the way Chris keeps shedding layers of clothing. He’s down to just a t-shirt now, and Darren keeps reaching out and rubbing his hand over Chris’s bicep. “Have you always had these?” 

Chris grins and sways in toward him. “Gotta have something to do while you’re all busy, so I started going to the gym.”

“Oooh, someone wants to get all buff for their boy.” Meredith seems to be applauding the effort. “I wouldn’t know what that’s like. What game are we playing?”

“Never have I ever,” Dylan announces, dropping himself onto the couch. “Minions, gather, for now we continue to drink and make merry with embarrassing tales of exploits past.” 

Chris leans into Darren. He tries to whisper, but clearly fails, because Joey overhears him. “What is this?” 

“VIRGIN!” Joey announces, loudly. “Newbie! Fresh meat!”

For the next ten minutes Chris gets a crash course in the rules of ‘never have I ever’ - made infinitely more complicated with half a dozen people trying to all explain at once. Eventually he understands more or less what they’re doing. It takes another fifteen minutes for everyone to top off their drinks and gather around. 

“Chris starts, since he’s the new kid,” Nick decides. 

It doesn’t take Chris long to think of one that he won’t have to drink for. “Never have I ever had sex with a girl.” 

Everyone drinks but Chris, Lauren, and Jaime. 

They go around the circle, each of them typically targeting one other person with very specific statements. 

“Never have I ever eaten two pizzas and drank a two liter orange soda in one meal.” Joey drinks. 

“Never have I ever had sex in a different country.” Darren and Dylan drink. 

“Never have I ever accidentally left my vibrator out when my parents came over.” Lauren drinks. 

“Never have I ever walked in on a sibling having sex.” Darren and Matt drink. 

“Never have I ever made out with Darren.” 

Everyone drinks. 

Chris looks over at him, face falling. “Really?”

Darren scoots in closer and puts his arms around Chris, head on his shoulder. “I love you? Like half of them were on stage, that shouldn’t even count.” 

“But - even Joey?” Chris asks. 

“It was a dare,” Joey says. Darren nods his agreement.

“Yeah, for the first thirty seconds. The five minutes after that was all you, dudes,” Nick says. 

Chris doesn’t say anything and there’s an awkward moment before he rolls his eyes and says. “Okay, whose turn?” 

Jaime puts him out of his misery by speaking up. “Never have I ever masturbated with my roommate in the room.” 

Everyone except Dylan and Chris drink. Chris looks at Dylan. “I don’t even have a roommate,” he says, shrugging. 

“You’ve masturbated _me_ with _my_ roommate in the room,” Darren says, grinning at Chris. 

“Doesn’t count.” Chris says, very proud of how his voice is only a little higher than normal. “That wasn’t what he said.” 

“Technicality. Gross, gross technicality.” Joey whines pathetically. 

Darren leans in and whispers to Chris. “You sure this is okay? Because I can shut them up. I can find a way to do that, if it’s bothering you.” 

Chris gives it a little bit of thought and then smiles at Darren, shaking his head. “No, it’s fine. It’s fun.” 

“Sure?” Darren can’t quite mask his surprise, but he looks pleased. 

Chris nods. “Hey, it’s your turn. Do your worst,” he dares him. 

“Oooh, a challenge. I like it.” Darren grins. “Never have I ever had my roommate walk in on me getting my first handjob.” 

Chris eyes Darren triumphantly. “I don’t think I have to drink to that, either. He came in just after.” 

Darren pokes Chris in the side. “Dude, I still had jizz on my hand, that is close e-fucking-nough.” 

“Fine.” Chris sighs and takes a drink. “Happy?” 

“No,” Joey says, listing to the side slightly. He points a finger at Chris. “No, you are too sober. Guys, he’s too sober.” 

“You are pretty sober...” Jaime frowns. “Okay, my turn. Never have I ever given a blowjob.” 

For the next ten minutes, it continues just like that. Chris isn’t the only person that drinks on most turns, but he’s the only one that has to drink on every turn. 

“Never have I ever had a boyfriend.” 

“Never have I ever majored in creative writing.” 

“Never have I ever stayed up all night watching Harry Potter.” 

“Never have I ever gotten a hard on in a theater classroom.” 

“Never have I ever dated Darren Criss.” 

(Julia guiltily takes a drink, but Chris doesn’t notice.)

“Never have I ever made out with Darren Criss in a club.” 

“Never have I ever given Darren Criss an orgasm in a club.” (Brian’s beleaguered contribution.)

“Never have I ever been sucked off by Darren Criss in the backseat of Nick’s car.” 

(“Darren!” Chris tries to slap a hand over Darren’s mouth before he can finish saying it, but it doesn’t work. His hand-eye coordination, shockingly, is slightly off at this point.

“Okay, you are never borrowing my car again,” Nick swears.)

“Never have I ever taken it up the ass.” 

Chris closes his eyes and doesn’t even look to see who is drinking. He doesn’t look at all until he realizes everyone has gone quiet. When he opens his eyes again, everyone is staring at him. Darren is making wide-eyed faces like he’s trying to very un-subtly discourage any and all commentary. 

“Well. Okay, then.” Julia is the voice of blessed reason, or at least tries to be. “Nev-” 

“Wait, really?” Meredith asks. “But you’ve been dating for like-” 

“I hate you all,” Chris moans, dropping down onto his back on the floor and covering his face with his hands. The room is definitely tilting now. “Darren, make the room be still.” 

Darren lays down beside him. “I’m afraid I can’t do that, Christopher.” 

“You’re mean,” Chris whines. 

“I think we just need a new game. I can threaten to kill anyone that brings it up again, though.” 

“Truth or dare!” Meredith shouts. 

“You know the rules to this one, now don’t you?” Darren asks. Chris opens one eye and then blinks in surprise when Darren’s face is much closer to him than he’d expected. 

“Yes. Yes, I know how to play truth or dare,” Chris grumbles. “Do I have to get up?” 

“Nope.” Darren scoots in closer, putting his hand on Chris’s stomach over his shirt. Chris wiggles around and then tugs his shirt up subtly until Darren’s fingers are on bare skin. Darren looks at him with a knowing smirk. “You really must be drunk.” 

“Sh’up,” Chris says, and then realizes that doesn’t sound right, so he repeats it again slowly. “Shut. Up.” 

“You are fucking adorable.” Darren kisses the words into his jaw, smiling. “And you taste like vodka.” 

Chris turns his face into the kiss, licking across Darren’s lip. “You taste... like Red Bull. Gross.” 

“Okay, okay, let’s start,” Meredith orders, her volume rising to get their attention. 

Darren sits up and drags Chris into a somewhat upright position, too. 

The first few are typical, stupid truth-or-dare type of questions, but it doesn’t take long to devolve into something almost purely sexual. Choosing truth is an open invitation to be asked insanely invasive questions, and dare is almost certainly going to lead to some form of touch or bodily fluid exchanged. 

Meredith and Lauren make out - both with faintly exasperated expressions, though once they get going they don’t seem that reluctant. 

Chris learns, among other things, that Meredith has never been in a threesome, Jamie has never fellated an inanimate object, Joey was seventeen when he lost his virginity, Dylan does not ‘manscape’, and Lauren hasn’t had sex in three weeks. 

(Meredith gives her a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. Dylan says if Meredith were a real friend she’d offer to help, and Joey says if both of them considered the rest of the group any sort of friend at all they’d film it.)

Darren dares Joey to email a picture of his junk to the TA he has a thing for, and they spend a hilarious fifteen minutes drunkenly operating the laptop to make a new email account to send it from. 

Chris mostly sits back and watches everything go down, but he’s not entirely passive. The longer the game goes on the emptier his drink gets, until Darren notices and magically the alcohol is replenished. Chris decides that he really needs to thank Darren for his kindness and slides his hand down the back of Darren’s pants. Of course, he can’t reach very far, but it’s apparently far enough. 

Darren turns on him and playfully growls, nibbling at Chris’s neck. Chris gasps and tilts his head to the side, vocally encouraging it - much more loudly than anyone around them expects, judging by the way they all look over and then stare. 

It’s Joey’s turn and he has revenge on the mind. “Truth or dare,” he says, pointing at Darren. “Your name has dare in it so you really have to pick that.” 

Darren gives Chris’s neck one last suction-filled kiss and then looks up. Chris whines, bumping his shoulder against Darren’s like that will bring his attention back. “You try that every time. But fine. Dare.” 

“Dare you to give Chris a lap dance.” 

It takes a minute for Chris’s mind to catch up to the dare. Darren glances over at Chris like he’s asking permission.

A lap dance? 

From his boyfriend? 

It actually seems pretty tame, considering what people have had to do so far, so he shrugs. “Okay?”

Joey whoops and within a minute Lauren is shuffling through her ipod to find a good song and Chris is being emphatically relocated onto the couch. He expects some giggling, Darren rubbing his ass over Chris’s crotch, and then moving on. 

He doesn’t expect Darren to start by straddling Chris’s knees while he stands facing away from Chris. To the opening notes of Glory Box, he lifts his shirt up, revealing the tanned smooth skin of his back to Chris. Chris can’t take his eyes off the ripple and flex of muscle under the skin as he lifts the shirt over his head and tosses it onto the floor. 

As the song picks up he starts to move. His hips swivel and he settles with his knees bracketing Chris’s thighs. He sits straight up then, and Chris has a nice and up close view of the swell of his ass under those ridiculous purple plaid shorts he’s wearing. 

Darren drops down suddenly and Chris’s hand jerks out because he needs to grab something. His fingers curl around the arm of the couch until Darren grins and tugs it away, puts it on his own chest so Chris can feel the warmth of his skin and his heartbeat. Darren leans back flush against Chris and some time between Darren’s ass making contact with Chris’s crotch and Darren thumbing open the button on his shorts, Chris sort of forgets there’s a room full of people watching them. 

When the shorts begin to slip down Darren’s hips, Darren guides his hand down. Chris can’t see but he can feel the v that he loves to run his tongue over and lower, fingers brushing against the curly public hair peeking out over the elastic of his boxers. 

By that point, Chris is lucky that he remembers other people even exist in the same realm of consciousness. The entire world narrows down to those triangles of material parting and the shorts slipping further down Darren’s hips. Chris knows what his own touch does to Darren so he can imagine the line of Darren’s cock grow thicker and longer in his boxers. 

A whine gets caught low in Chris’s throat and Darren pushes Chris’s hand further and further down, like he’s daring Chris to check for himself, to go for it and grope him. Just as Chris’s fingers are almost there, Darren pushes back in a fluid motion and gets to his feet.

The shorts fall to the floor and Darren steps neatly out of them, then climbs back onto Chris’s lap but faces him this time. God, it’s so much better when he can see Darren’s face while he does this. Darren is still dancing - sort of, in that spazzy Darren way - and his eyes are half shut as he loses himself in the music and working Chris into a rock hard state with the swell of his perfect ass grinding down. Chris lets his forehead press against Darren’s shoulder and he says Darren’s name in a halting, overwhelmed voice. 

Darren stands up abruptly, grabbing Chris’s hand. The song isn’t even half done but the dance is over. “Come on,” he says, unphased by pesky little things like shame as he walks through a living room full of people in his underwear (clothes still abandoned on the floor) and drags Chris behind him. 

It’s Chris that slams the door behind them and shoves Darren against it, kissing him hard. “Oh my god you just-” 

Darren turns them around and Chris thinks this is going in a very good direction, but then Darren backs away. He stumbles back to his desk and then drops down into the chair, holding his arms out and grinning cockily. “Return the favor?” 

“I- what? I can’t...” He blushes hotly just thinking of it. 

“Can’t what?” Darren reaches down and rubs himself through his boxers. “Please? I want you.” 

“You want me to give you a lapdance?” Chris’s hands shake as he takes a few stumbling steps forward. “There’s no music.” 

Darren starts to hum, and then sing. “ _I wanna fuck you like an animal..._ ”

Chris snorts. “Really?” 

" _I wanna feel you from the inside..._ ” Darren’s eyes go dark and smoldering, 

“I can’t...” Chris tries again, shaking his head. Darren rolls forward on the chair and grabs Chris by the belt loops of his jeans. 

“You can.” He looks up at Chris and it’s one of those moments where just with a look Darren can make Chris feel so many things. Sexy, grown up, _wanted_. He lets Darren undo his jeans and work them off in a move that really shouldn’t by any rights be sexy but Darren’s hands on him is hot enough to make up for it. 

Darren is still singing when Chris sits on his lap. The chair rolls backwards until it bumps against the bed and then Chris is on Darren’s lap, arms slung loosely over his shoulders as he rests their foreheads together, grinding over Darren’s hard on. They’ve only done this before for the pure purpose of getting off together, never just as a tease. It’s heady, and it makes him feel powerful when he makes Darren groan, the song interrupted and then forgotten. 

“Bed?” Chris asks, desperately wanting more now. “Please?” 

“Don’t-” Darren grasps his face and kisses him hard, grabbing Chris’s ass. “Don’t have to ask twice, whatever you want.” 

What he wants. 

“Loaded question,” Chris says, but he stands up and grabs Darren’s hands. Darren stumbles into him and kisses him hard, backing him into the post of the bed. Chris grabs Darren’s ass, pushing his hands into his underwear to get to bare flesh. Darren is warm to the touch and makes such perfect noises as he grinds into Chris. “I love your ass.” 

Darren laughs breathlessly. “I love your cock. Sounds like a match made in heaven.” 

He runs one hand down Chris’s side and then drops down, hooking his hands under one of Chris’s thighs to lift his leg up until it wraps around Darren. Chris leans back into the ladder of the bunk beds with his shoulders and forward into Darren with his hips. 

There are more kisses, wet and messy and heated, and then Darren’s sliding damp lips over Chris’s cheek to suck just below his jaw. “You still want that stuff you said on the phone the other day? You still want to fuck me with the dildo?” 

“Ohgod,” Chris pants. One hand goes up to Darren’s curls to grab and pull just a little, just how Darren likes. “Yes.” 

“Do it, do it-” 

“Hey, Lauren wants to know- aw, fuck, really?” The door flies open. “Laur, I _told you_ that’s what they were doing! No! No! Bad horndogs! The ladder is community property! No fucking on the ladder!”

“We’re not fucking,” Chris says, at the same time Darren says: “We’re not on the ladder!” 

“You are leaning against the ladder, and there are unclothed body parts in contact, that is close enough.” Joey crosses his arms and shows no signs of moving. “Lauren wants you guys to come back in there, anyway. She said you aren’t allowed to get some unless you can ensure that everyone else gets to get some, too.” 

Chris slides his arms around Darren’s waist, resting his forehead on Darren’s shoulder. He can usually tolerate these sorts of interruptions, but they are really... really... getting old. “Darren,” he whispers, a little bit pathetically. 

Darren covers Chris’s hands with his own where they rest on Darren’s stomach. “I know.” He sounds just as dejected as Chris does, because both of them know they won’t get any peace or privacy now. With a huge sigh, Darren pulls away and grabs a shirt - Chris’s shirt - off of the floor. 

Chris grabs a shirt off of the pile in the basket that he knows is clean and just hasn’t been put away yet. (That, realistically, will never be put away, just slowly grabbed from until it has turned into a pile of dirty clothes again.) 

Once he’s confident that the disrobing won’t continue once he’s walked away, Joey leaves. 

“Hey-” Darren stays, frowning and leaning back against his desk. “I’m sorry.” 

“For what?” Chris rubs his hands over his face. He’s still half hard but he’s pretty sure the looks and laughter from everyone they’re about to go re-join will kill that for him in no time at all. 

“This whole timing thing. It kind of blows.” Darren pushes away from the desk and walks over to him, holding his hands out. Chris smiles and takes them. 

“How did you do it before?” He asks. It’s a question that’s been on Chris’s mind a little bit, but he hasn’t had the nerve to ask. “I know you... uh, hooked up. You didn’t have this problem?” 

Darren doesn’t seem to really be thrilled to have to answer it, looking at Chris like he’s a little wary of the reaction, but he still answers without much hesitation. “Can I just say my standards were a little lower? It’s easy to get Joey out for an hour once or twice a month, and there wasn’t really anyone I met that I really wanted to take my time with.” 

“Oh.” Chris smiles just a little. He’s mostly teasing when he says, “So I’m just the special snowflake, then?”

“Chris, you are... the most fucking special... anything.” Darren, for once, doesn’t sound like he’s teasing at all. He gives Chris a kiss so shockingly intense that it almost makes up for the lack of anything else that’s going to happen that night. 

*

 

For the first time in Chris Colfer’s life, it’s February 14th and he can look at the day as something besides the twenty four hour period before chocolate goes on half price sale. 

He has a boyfriend and he is _going_ to take advantage of it. He’s never had the chance to make a romantic gesture before, he’s never had anyone that would appreciate it - and he’s not going to let his lingering insecurity get in his way this time. 

Three days before, he makes reservations at the same restaurant they’d gone to on their first non-date, and their first real date. The restaurant isn’t a place that normally really requires reservations but for Valentine’s Day he wants to make sure they’ll get in. 

The entire day before, he tries to caution himself not to expect anything. Just knowing he has someone on the day itself should be reward enough. He’s not sure if Darren will remember that there’s actually a holiday, much less get Chris anything, and Chris honestly doesn’t really care (much). He still has the gift certificate to the music store that he’d bought and never given Darren for Christmas, and he decides it’ll be a nice gesture - not so nice that Darren will feel bad if he didn’t get Chris anything, but enough that Chris can be pleased at having made the effort himself. 

Of course, Darren is nothing if not unpredictable. Chris is walking to his first class and he’s just outside the building when he hears a voice call out, “Hey there, sexy.” 

He turns and sees Darren standing there with a grin on his face. He has coffee in one hand and an obnoxiously pink heart-shaped cookie in the other, that he holds up level with his own heart as he makes a goofy face at Chris. 

Chris can’t stop a huge grin from forming as he closes the distance between them. “Hi,” he says, breathless from the gesture just as much as the walk from his dorm. “Is that... for me?” 

“No, stupid.” Darren rolls his eyes. “It’s for Professor Jameston. Man, talk about a silver fox.”

“Asshole.” Chris snatches the cookie from him, and then delicately puts it in the outermost pocket of his bag where it won’t get crushed. He takes the coffee next and inhales deeply before taking a sip. “This is amazing.” 

“Hey, there are red and pink sprinkles on it, too.” Darren informs him. “But then I put a lid on it so it wouldn’t spill and they’re probably melted by now.” 

“I’m sure they add to the flavor.” Chris reassures him. “Thank you.” 

“I’ve gotta run to class, but kiss?” He puckers his lips up. Chris leans and cups the back of Darren’s neck, demanding a real kiss that Darren is all too happy to return. 

Chris would be perfectly fine if that were it, but it’s not. At lunch Darren drops a flower onto Chris’s tray in the dining hall that Chris can’t stop staring at the entire meal, and discretely presses between the pages of a notebook when he’s finished eating. 

Chris has another class after lunch, but Darren is waiting for him afterward again. “I have work,” Chris reminds him, in case Darren had forgotten. 

“I know, silly.” Darren grins at him. “Three hours, right?” 

“Yeah, short shift today.” Chris smiles because he’d requested the short shift. 

“Perfect. Okay, so here’s the plan,” Darren says, once they fall into step beside each other. “I got us tickets to a concert at that jazz hall downtown. These guys are supposed to be great, so I thought you’d like it. They’re doing this old school big band love song medley. It starts at seven, so if you want to just head back to your room after work and get changed, we can meet up at six?”

“You got us tickets to something? At seven?” Chris stops walking. 

Darren stops because Chris stops. “Yeah, that okay? I was aiming for, you know, romantic surprise?”

“Actually...” Chris frowns. “I made us dinner reservations at Palio for seven-thirty.” 

“Oh. Wow, really?” Darren seems genuinely surprised, though Chris isn’t entirely sure why he would be. “Shit, why didn’t I think of that? I mean, no, that’s awesome, though.” 

“I can cancel, I guess...” Chris says, hesitant. “If you made plans. I just didn’t know...”

“Me, either.” Darren grins. “I think what we have here is a failure to communicate. But don’t cancel dinner, okay? How about this - see if we can move the reservations back an hour, then we can catch the first part of the concert and leave early?” 

“I can try.” Chris is doubtful, but after some more urging from Darren he calls and by some bit of luck someone has just canceled an 8:30 reservation that they snag. When he hands up the phone he gives Darren an apologetic look. “Um, I’m sorry - I mean... I should have mentioned it, but you didn’t say anything about Valentine’s Day and I didn’t want to just assume...” 

He trails off when he realizes Darren is staring at him with a smile on his face. 

“You’re adorable,” Darren says, leaning in to kiss him. “It’s no problem, okay? We just had the same idea. Nothing wrong with that, and it worked out fine. Now I have to go get all pretty for this guy I want to impress later, so I’m gonna run.”

He looks so cute - caught somewhere between sheepish and excited, hair mussed from the wind and cheeks red. Chris kisses him again just because he can and then shoves him back. “Well, I know how long it takes for you to actually look good, so yeah, you better go.” 

Darren takes a few steps back, but keeps facing Chris, grinning. “We can’t all roll out of bed looking like perfection.” 

“I know. You’re jealous.” Chris winks and then gives a little wave and turns away. 

*

Chris is just leaving work when his phone rings. “You have to come over right now,” Darren says. 

“Oh, God. You didn’t find another kitten, did you?” Chris asks. 

“No, even better. Look, I know we have the concert and the dinner reservations and I totally want to check out the concert, too, but - Chris. No one is home.” 

“What?” Chris actually stops walking. “What do you mean?” 

“I got back to my place, and it’s empty. Like, they’re all gone.” 

“Did you check the closets? Under the bed? Joey isn’t hiding and just waiting, is he?” Chris starts walking again, a little more quickly this time. Even when the actual people that live in the apartment aren’t there, stragglers usually gather. The apartment is never just empty. 

“Nope. All clear. So, uh, do you want to like - if you come over here now, we could have some time to... fool around and stuff. Before our plans.” He can hear the excitement and hope in Darren’s voice and Chris can’t say he doesn’t honestly feel the same about the prospect of a bed and no interruptions. He decides what he’s wearing now will be just fine for the concert and dinner, and if it isn’t - well, he can borrow something. 

Fifteen minutes later, he’s pushing the door to the apartment open. “Darren?” 

Darren pops out of the kitchen, grinning. “Chris. The apartment.” 

“It’s empty.” Chris looks around in awe. 

“I texted everyone. Matt is out for the day. Nick has a date. Joey’s on campus at some movie screening until eight. I’m locking the door and I sent a group text to anyone I thought might have a key telling them that I will do bodily harm to them if they show up.” 

“Wow.” Chris is fairly impressed with the impromptu organizational skills Darren is exhibiting. 

Darren rocks back on his heels and grins. “So, you wanna...” 

He glances toward the bedroom. 

“Godyes,” Chris says, then Darren’s mouth is on his and they stumble into the bedroom together, locking the door behind them. Just in case. 

“What do you want?” Darren asks, eyes wide. Then he winces. “Wow, I’m such a romantic, aren’t I? I mean- ” 

Chris thinks of last time Darren had asked that, how the words had stuck in his throat, how he just hadn’t been sure until it was too late. 

He’s sure now. “You,” he says, sliding his fingers through Darren’s. His voice is low and confident in a way he’s just learning how to really embrace.. “I want you. More of you.” 

“Yeah. Yeah, okay.” Darren almost falls over himself getting naked, and Chris laughs and raises a hand to his mouth and just watches for a minute before he realizes that it really might be beneficial they’re both naked. He stomps down his nerves and strips quickly. “Wait- okay. What exactly do you want? So I don’t... I mean. I don’t want to be that dick that... assumes, or like, pressures-” 

“I don’t think I want... all the way. Yet.” Chris stresses the yet. “But I want to try some things. I want to do more.” 

“Can I tell you what I want?” Darren asks. He lifts one of Chris’s hands between them and kisses his fingertips, giving Chris goosebumps and a faint sense of deja vu. “I want your fingers in me, because I keep using the dildo and just imagining that it’s you... fuck, I want it to be you.” 

“Okay.” Chris smiles and pushes Darren onto the bed. He grabs the lube before he joins Darren, straddling him and ducking low to avoid hitting his head on the top bunk. “I don’t know what I’m doing. You know that, right?” 

Darren crosses his arms behind his head and grins. “So? Neither do I. I mean, I’ve had sex before, but I’ve never had this kind of sex and never with you, so that makes it something totally new.” 

Somehow, that is just the right thing to say. Chris puts the lube down beside him, tube rolling into Darren’s side with the dip in the mattress as Chris balances and then leans down for a kiss. Darren indulges him until he can’t anymore, squirming and impatient. “I’m sorry, I’m a jerk, I just really want you to touch me.” 

Chris laughs into the kiss. “Yeah, yeah. Okay.” 

But then Darren is kissing him again while Chris slicks up his fingers and touches Darren there - not for the first time, but for the first time with purpose, pressing one finger in and marveling over how insanely intimate this feels, somehow more invasive than his cock in Darren’s mouth, more real and intimidating. This is what no one talks about, this is what he’s only heard about on websites and the occasional creative insult slung at him from decidedly straight boys in school. But he doesn’t think about any of that right now, he doesn’t think about anything except making Darren feel good. 

“Gimme another,” Darren orders, shifting around a little and planting his heels more firmly against the bed. Chris kneels awkwardly hunched over with two fingers inside Darren and his other hand on Darren’s cock, stroking just enough to keep him hard. He’d expected that it would feel uncomfortable for Darren considering the shocking tightness of his body around Chris’s fingers, but Darren is rocking into it almost immediately. “More.” 

“Fuck,” Chris breathes out slowly, watching three fingers now press into Darren. “Oh my God.” 

“Mmm, yes.” Darren throws back his head, cock twitching against Chris’s hand. “Oh, fuck, Chris. That’s so good. Fuck me with them.” 

At this point Chris thinks it’s a good thing he has no free hands because he’s not sure it’s going to take _anything_ for him to come. 

Chris thinks of what else is in the drawer. “Tell me what it feels like,” he says. 

Darren smiles, eyes crinkling. He’s got one arm stretched over his head, fingers gripping the pole at the corner of the bed, and the other gripping the blanket underneath him. “Full. Good. Just... so fucking good. I love coming with something inside me.” 

Chris shudders at the raw pleasure in Darren’s voice. “Do you want more?” 

Darren’s eyes go wide. “Seriously? You mean-” 

“Uh, the... the toy.” Chris only trips over the word slightly. As he talks he strokes Darren’s cock with a firm grip, squeezing at the base in a way that makes Darren buck upward. “I could fuck you with it.” 

“Yes, shit. Yeah.” 

Even as enthusiastic as he is about the idea, Darren still whines when Chris pulls his fingers out. Chris sort of feels like doing the same, looking down at the way Darren looks now, more open and glistening with the lube. 

“Or I could, instead. I could... fuck you. I want to I want to be in you.” Chris feels his face turn red (redder) when he says it, because despite the certainty with which the words come out of his mouth he’s still surprising both of them by admitting it. He’s still nervous, he’s still unsure, but in this moment right here with Darren in front of him - he can’t entirely remember why waiting seemed like such a necessary thing. 

Darren answers slowly and carefully, eyes trained on Chris’s face. “Whatever you want. Seriously... if you really want to, but you don’t like... _have_ to...” 

Chris leans down and kisses him hard, lips mashing together. “I want to.” 

“Condoms are in-” 

“I know.” Chris cuts him off, getting off of the bed on wobbly legs. He grabs one of the condoms from the box and when he looks back over, Darren is watching him with one hand lazily moving on himself. 

“You look so hot,” Darren says. “Come here. I want to kiss you.” 

Chris smiles and obliges, laying down on the bed beside Darren this time instead of between his legs. Despite the urgency of their bodies, the kiss stays sweet while Darren takes over, tugs the condom from Chris’s grasp and puts it on him.

Their lips are still presses together, sharing breath, when Darren asks, “Sure?” one more time, like he can’t help himself. 

Chris nods. “Yeah?” 

“Can I do it like this?” Darren asks, pushing Chris onto his back. “Me on top?” 

Chris barely has time to nod again before Darren is straddling him, only bumping his head on the bunk above him once before he finds a good position. “Here, can you...” He guides Chris’s hand down so Chris can hold his cock in place while he lowers himself. Darren puts both of his hands on Chris’s chest and drops down. 

“Oh.” Darren’s eyes go wide again. “Wow, that’s. More. That’s... more than I’m used to.” 

“Fuck!” Chris gets a little panicky. “Is it okay? Do you need to-” 

Darren puts a hand over his mouth. “All I need right now is to get fucked by my boyfriend, okay?” 

Underneath Darren’s hand, Chris grins and nods. He thrusts his hips up and Darren lets out a choked laugh. It spurs him into action though, moving experimentally and then finding his rhythm after a couple of tries. 

It’s almost mind-numbingly good, once Chris’s body catches up to the fact that his mind can stop stressing. The distraction of nerves, he realizes, was probably a fortunate thing because he’s on the verge of coming almost immediately. 

Darren notices, but there’s absolutely no judgement in his eyes. “Go ahead,” he says. “Probably better if it doesn’t last too long this time... I’m gonna be sore as fuck later.” 

“I, ah-” Chris bites down on his bottom lip. “Okay. If... _fuck, Darren._ ” 

“Mhmm. Just like that, baby. God, you feel good.” Darren urges him on, ignoring his own cock while he watches Chris come, and then quickly beginning to jerk himself off. “Oh, whoa, wow. Chris, _fuck_ , I can feel you.” 

Chris slumps back, feeling sweaty and tingly and momentarily drained from coming the hardest he has in a while. He reaches out for Darren, not trying to dislodge the hand Darren has on himself but wanting to help, cupping Darren’s balls and then rubbing two fingers over the head of his cock with his other hand. 

It works. Darren is caught off guard by his own orgasm, clenching tight around Chris as his come lands on Chris’s skin, the two larger spurts dripping down the slope of his ribs to puddle on his stomach. 

He eases himself off after a second and then lets his weight drop half on top of Chris, one arm flung over Chris’s stomach. “Wow. Holy fucking shit.” 

“Vulgar.” Chris teases him. “And messy.” 

He looks down at where Darren is smearing his own come over Chris’s skin. Darren looks too, and just laughs. “I would offer to lick it off for you, except I don’t think I can move right now.” 

“That makes two of us,” Chris says. He stretches, body pleasantly tired now, and then leans over the side of the bed to grab Darren’s t-shirt. He wipes himself up quickly and offers Darren the shirt, but Darren shakes his head and sits up. 

“I want to cuddle, but my asshole is wet and uh, that’s kind of... unpleasant now. So, I’m just gonna go... take care of that. And then cuddling.” He takes the condom with him and drops it in the trash on the way out. 

Chris facepalms, but once Darren is gone he actually appreciates having a moment to just breathe. He turns and buries his face in the pillow and smiles so hard, working it out of his system and composing himself before Darren comes back in. 

“Now,” Darren says, standing in the doorway with a hand on his hip, gloriously naked. “Where were we?” 

“Right here.” Chris holds his arms open and Darren comes barreling toward him, bouncing onto the bed and sliding right into place. He throws a leg over Chris’s thigh and wraps both arms around him. 

“Yep,” Darren says, pressing a kiss to Chris’s shoulder before nuzzling his cheek against the same spot. “This is exactly where we were.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Mav and Scott, who have to put up with more and more of me the longer this series goes on. I predict by part ten they will have banded together to form a coup.


End file.
